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發表於 2008-6-12 10:31:36
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ill try to do my best:-) 2008.06.11 (Wed) 11:49
I got an announcement for you today.
I will be appearing in CX's july drama serial "Sun and Ocean Classroom" (broadcast every monday at 21:00)!
Oda Yūji-san will be the lead in the school drama,
and I will be the heroine as the rookie high-school teacher.
I got to confess to the readers of this blog,
that when I first got the story of this drama,
I honestly thought, "I wonder if I'm right for it...".
My drama work experience is still insufficient,
and quite a bit of time has passed since my last drama, so...
Playing in a drama, what was that like?
Filming for a drama, how did that go?
Can I remember how I did my lines last time?
Eventually, a mountainous anxiety encroached on me.
Moreover, in my view the CX's monday nine heroine
requires a much more important actress,
so when it was decided that it would be me it put a big pressure on me.
Am I right for it?
What if the work is ruined because of me?
Can I take on a teacher's role?
Am I not much too inexperienced to be appear in this now?
For me to appear, I would have wanted to add many more years of acting
experience so I'd have the self-confidence to appear convincingly.
If I had more confidence in acting...
If had been further in my career...
If I were more relaxed in my feelings...
Then I would get past the anxiety.
That's what I thought.
When the intangible anxieties and fears got rooted into my mind,
I opened my heart to some of my friends.
My former movie co-star Urata Naoya-san of AAA,
said to me:
"I understand what you feel, but you needn't worry!
For every 100 people who like Kitagawa Keiko, there are surely 100 people who hate you.
But that's okay! It would be boring otherwise!!
Be your usual self and you'll be fine!!!"
My close friend since modeling, Azama Myuu,
said to me:
"Monday nine looks like quite a big hurdle, I can understand that you feel that you're still on the lower steps of the acting ladder,
and that being selected means that a lot is expected of you,
but there are many who support you and many who look forward to it,
so enjoy yourself with confidence!"
Hearing these words from my friends cleared the fog from my mind instantly.
Also, at the time when I met CX producer Murase-san,
I said frankly,
"I have no idea why you chose to cast me."
He explained the deciding factors for the casting to me.
(Writing it all down would get long, so I give it a pass)
He told me the precise reasons for selecting each and every member of the cast, for which I'm quite happy.
The deciding factors for the casting, why we'd do the drama, what we want to convey to the viewer, and lots more things were explained to me,
deepening my understanding of the work.
And so I could for the first time think of myself as one of the makers of this work, which was a relief.
Since then my anxiety-anxiety lament also ceased,
and in the spirit of my friends' words I had the,
"I will do my best as much as I can for all the people who support me!"
positive spirit be born within me.
And in response to the anticipation by the producer who selected me and others concerned, while even though my acting is still far from perfect,
I'm determined to
do my best to give all 100% of the strength I have to give!
I'm really glad to have found such a positive motivation before the filming started...
Listening to my worries as if they were their own,
I'm thankful for the awareness given by my family, my friends, and Murase-P.
Until now I thought that to consult with people, to openly tell of my anxieties,
was a very uncool thing to do, so I avoided it,
but it's not like that at all, misrepresenting my anxieties is several times more uncool.
This time, opening up about my feelings to the people around me was a life-saver.
I keenly realize that people don't live life alone,
we live thanks to the support of the people around us.
"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow,
for tomorrow will worry about itself.
Each day has enough trouble of its own." (Matthew 6:34)
That's one of my favourite sayings.
Although now that filming has started and I'm getting caught up in the
atmosphere of the set a little anxiety seems to remain...
I want to stop worrying about the distant future,
and do my very best day by day.
Watch over me kindly, everyone.
Please take care of me. |
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IP卡
狗仔卡
顯身å¡
發表於 2008-6-12 11:11:27
